i wish

This post is just a straight-out-of the-heart piece, excuse the lack of polishing, but I couldn't do it to this post:

u feel the distance
tell me about it
i listen, feel helpless
wishing it was different
but not saying it
wishing i could say something that would unite us, if only in dream world
but i keep quiet

u paint me a picture
of togetherness
'i come to meet u
hold your hand
hug you
warm your heart
sit beside you
hand in hand
whispering sweet nothings in my ear
an occasional peck on the cheek
smiles
warm air on my neck as u speak
blushes

my head on your shoulder
your arm around me
a lock of hair troubling me
you see it and smile and put it behind my ear
kiss my forehead 
ruffle my hair
i drift off to sleep'

no words needed
the silence speaks

although i don't say it
i wish it comes true
because i have never wanted anything more
never pined for anyone more
i realise the hardships, the mess
but this makes me happy
i can't be scared of wanting something that makes me smile

i shall wait
for the eventual
till then, i have a thousand pictures in my mind
waiting to be painted...

interminably

Wandering, where my destiny lay
reaching out for a hand but found none

life lay there, scattered
around me
as i strove each day, to piece it together
unaware how byzantine it had become

until

thunder, lightening, wind, mist, sunshine- all at once 
on a Red night, i see the moon
unblemished, plenary, auroral, like it did not need the sun anymore
& there it is, i see it, a shadow
a shadow of someone i know, someone i have known interminably

someone who swept me away with flattery and charm
charm like i've known in few mortals
flattery to which i woke up one day

but most manifest was the pure, gentle heart

so, my habits i change now
distance myself from food and sleep. inconsequential.
i feed on conversations, on furtive hints, on unsaid promises, on inside jokes
on smiles, on laughter, on skirmishes
on permutations and combinations, cosmology and physics, on literature
& i hope

i know not where this leads
i know not how this ends
but i want to live it, bask in its splendour

so i leave the inevitable, to the eventual
& savour the moment